Written by Alexandria Hilton
Welcome to Zimbabwe! The beating heart of Africa, with its river running through.
As my knowledge deepens, I see Zim as a great option for someone who wants wild, remote, unspoiled bush; if your idea of luxury is less fine-dining and more fresh air, less private plunge pool and more elephants drinking, less humans and more space, this itinerary is for you.
Imagine you are here, finally here, after one whole year of plans and deposits and intermittent emails from me about why you should still be excited for this journey of yours. The day has come. Today, you land at the Victoria Falls Airport.
Land and be met by a friendly face, someone who tells you his name is “Prince,” (I encourage you to ask his Ndebele name; I promise it sounds more beautiful, even if the consonants feel funny in your mouth). Prince already knows your name and where you’re headed — Mpala Jena. In his mini-van, you travel some 30-ish minutes to the entrance to the National Park where you’ll be met by your lodge guide and transferred into a bumpier, dustier game drive vehicle. It will take 45-ish minutes to reach your sanctuary on the shores of The Mighty Zambezi.
This camp is for those eager to stay steps away from the river — those hoping to wake up between four air-conditioned gauzy walls of mozzi net, your alarm the grunts of hippos. The property itself is bohemian-chic and the staff are warm and wanting to know about you and where you come from. I was particularly impressed with my barwoman, Tina, who said my name like we had been dear friends for years and by our chef, who has perfected pork to an improbable texture.
On the morning you depart Mpala Jena, you and each of your soft-sided bags find yourself in a jet boat manned by one of a small handful of men who know the language of these waters. Do you know how to read rapids?
Prince awaits your safe landing at the jetty and drives you back to the Victoria Falls airport. You’ll be escorted to an airport lounge — a comfortable place to complete check-in and enjoy a coffee before you head through security and find your bush-plane on the tarmac.
Your destination is Mana Pools. You may have met some fellow safari-goers in the lounge who need dropping off; buckle up for a couple hours of flying.
Your first day at Kanga, elephants drink from the pool before your host finishes his main camp orientation. Excitedly, you ask if the indemnity forms can wait until after we’ve had a swim with the ellies because they’re here now and they might not be here for much longer!!! and Jaison does not have the heart to say, “absolutely not because …. Obviously not!” You hurriedly strip off your shoes and sweaty socks. You quietly, carefully make your way to the edge of the pool. You are eventually encouraged to submerge yourself completely in the pool, fully-clothed! And you, of course, wade in. And you decide in that moment that you would do the same again. And again.
And so you do, for your entire two-night stay. And you start to feel friendly with the elephants and it is the duty of everyone in camp to ensure you make it to your fan-only tent safely each night because, well, the elephants, much like my younger brother in his tween years, do not know their own strength. While I agree the eye-contact you made with that young bull yesterday demonstrated a deeply resonant emotional intelligence, they are friends who could kill you in one go, no questions asked. Few will ever in their lives experience the wild in this way.
On your departure day, your Kanga guide will take you, as quickly or as slowly as you prefer, towards water. You may come across some Ground Hornbills on the way. You may notice big open spaces and wonder whether rivers used to flow here and your guide will tell you that people used to stay here, that just some 50 years back, villagers lived where you now drive.
Chikwenya awaits and… my goodness… is well-worth the wait.
*note from your author: This stretch of river is, by far and away, my new most favorite place on Earth and the most awe-inspired place I have ever consumed. And I choose consumed with every intention of communicating how it feels to exist there: yes, the rooms are well-appointed and the ice is big and cold — The luxury of this place, though, is in its extraordinary remoteness, in the precise paradox of fullness within emptiness — if you crave open space, clean air, and time for quiet contemplation and connection to your loved ones, this is the place for you.
Here, you realize you had no idea how much you needed a cool breeze off the surface of the flowing river. You board a boat and sit in a simple foldable chair and enjoy nibbles of biltong as the sun sets and the Carmine Bee-Eaters nest in the banks. You are convinced you have never seen a more haunting forest than the one you’ve just passed and so you ask, “can we go there tomorrow? Like…. In there?” It is at this point in the itinerary that your childlike wonder has been properly activated; two full days in the bush has had its effect. You are craving a deeper experience already and you feel empowered to give life to your dreams!
Your team will rarely give you a straight “no.” they will always work to accommodate your requests, It may take a few times to get the specifics communicated but oftentimes, what they work out will be better than what you had originally dreamed up.
On the day you bid farewell to the river and to Chikwenya, a 2-hour bush-flight lands you in Hwange just in time to enjoy a late lunch at Somalisa Tented Camp. You are welcomed by elephants and elephants and more elephants drinking and drinking and drinking. Before you know it, the sun is low and you’ve opted to skip evening drive. What’s coming to drink here is more than enough for you. There couldn’t really be anything better out there. I encourage you to stay in.
You are impressed, yet again, with the way this team invites you in with such warmth. Much like the drums they plays upon your arrival, there beats an almost tangible undertone of joy in each of their steps. Star, camp manager, and Bheki, your guide, are memorable for months to come. Each team is eager to meet personalized requests — if you like your whiskey on the rocks with exactly four cubes just as the dessert plate is being cleared, ask and you shall receive; my experience has been that as long as you ask and as long as the ask is within the realm of possibility, your team will make it happen.
On your last night in the bush, you receive word of an early departure: 8am wheels up to Vic Falls. At this point, that’s a sleep in! After 5 mornings of 5am “knock knock’s” you leave your packing to the morning of departure, leave on time, and arrive to Victoria Falls River Lodge in time for breakfast.
You land at the airport, a pro at navigating it now. You greet Prince like he’s a member of your family, now. He takes you 20 minutes to a jetty just outside of town. You climb into a pontoon boat this time after shaking hands with your guide, Aubz on his nametag (and it’s not the most outrageous of names you have encountered on your journey), and take 10 minutes cruise to the dock at River Lodge.
The busiest place you’ve been in days, this 14-room lodge offers a soft landing, a great place to prepare for re-entry, to plan things for your upcoming week back “in the real world,” a place whose realness you’re starting to question after all that time spent smiling at trees and whispering to lions and winking at rollers.
There is magic to the flow of this Zimbabwean itinerary. Each time you crave the water, it comes to you. Each time you crave the bush, it’s there. And when you are finally ready to make some choices, you arrive somewhere there’s an almost extensive menu for you to peruse.
And this country offers so much more — there are lakes and parks where even less humans roam. I can’t wait to chat to you more about it
